Open Letter to my Single Self

Dear single self, 

You're probably hating that Valentine's Day is approaching. All the hearts, pink paper, and abundant flowers only serve to remind you that you're still single. You dream about your happily ever after as you try not to get jealous about yet another Facebook relationship announcement and wedding pin. But as your heart aches, and part of you wonders what's wrong with you, let me tell you a few things that only wisdom and time can teach.

Nothing is wrong with you. You are not ugly or defective. This is a lie that Satan will tell you over and over until you let it sink into your heart. Unfortunately, he will continue to hammer this lie into your mind long after you have met and married The One. Don't let him morph this lie into a truth. It's hard to fight this lie, believe me, I know. Instead of focusing on and trying to figure out what's wrong with you, focus on the fact that God loves you unconditionally. He chose you, He honors you, and you are His favorite. Every time the lie that something is wrong with you comes to mind, choose to think about something else. Satan wants nothing more than you believing that something is wrong with you- don't give him this power over your life. 

You can't force it. I know that the mere idea of two people actually liking each other at the same time seems impossible to you. And you're right- if you try to force things, it is impossible. Closed doors hurt, but they are closed for a reason. They say that it will happen when you least expect it- as cliche as that is, it's true. So do your best and focus on everything else in your life. Pour yourself into school, into church, into relationships with friends. It will happen when it's meant to happen. 

Focus on the lesson. Remember that relationship that didn't work out? The one that you really hoped would? The one that hurt really bad? It broke your heart, made you question more than you should have, and is something that you had a hard time letting go. But more than the pain, remember what it taught you. You found a confidence in yourself that you didn't have before, and you gained a better understanding of what you really wanted in The One. Be thankful that things were left on good terms, and remember that doors are closed for a reason. Every relationship, every almost-relationship, and every relationship ended is a chance to learn and grow. Focus on the lesson and work to move on.

There are far better things to come. It doesn't matter how great that other person was- if it didn't work out, it wasn't supposed to because someone out there is far better for you. It's hard to imagine, I know, and you may not believe it until you see it. But hold onto hope that the best is yet to come- not only with your relationships but in your life in general. Enjoy the moment, but you can (and should) have hope for the future. 

Oh yeah, and this cheese Valentine's Day thing? Remember...

Valentine's Day is a bigger deal now that you're single than it will ever be when you find a significant other. It's fun to have a significant other on Valentine's Day, but ask any couple that's been together longer than two years and I bet they can't even tell you what they have planned for this Valentine's Day. Instead of sitting alone and sulking, get some friends together, some pizza and drinks, and throw on some movies. Enjoy yourself and use it as an excuse to have a night out with friends. Guaranteed, most of the dating/engaged/married couples you know won't be having as much fun as you will. 

Hang in there self, it'll happen. Be patient and focus on the things you can change and affect now. There is always hope for you- never ever forget that. 

Love,

Me

{Joining Kiki for The Circle Link up and Sweet Little Ones Tuesday Talk}

Adoption: When church made me cry

As some of you may or may not know, November has been declared National Adoption Month. This means different things for different people. Fast food chains get involved, people share awesome articles about adoption, and for me... well, for me, it means I write a post that has been heavy on my heart for awhile, but one I've been hesitant to share for one reason or another.

For as long as I can remember, I've had a special place in my heart for the orphan and adoption. Maybe it was my Dad's stories of volunteering in an orphanage in Mexico for seven years, maybe it was seeing the adoption specials that would come out on TV around Christmas time, or maybe it was a seed placed in my heart by the Lord himself (or a good combination of the three).

Long before I entered blog world, I found a blog about a huge, beautiful adoptive family , and to this day that blog is one of my favorite daily reads. Needless to say, when Alex and I were dating the subject of adoption came up and we both agreed that it was something we would both like to pursue in the future when the timing was right.

+ + +

Fast forward a couple of years, Alex and I were sitting in church one Sunday morning (this happened just a couple of months ago). Our pastor has the entire congregation pray for specific things or groups of people (i.e. teachers and students at the beginning of the school year). During these prayers, they invite people that fall in the particular category (teacher, student, etc.) to raise their hand so that those who don't fall in the particular category can gather around and pray for them.

This particular Sunday, a pastor connected with the church was leaving the following week to pick up his two children from Haiti, so the topic we were to pray for was adoption. The pastor asked those who were in the middle of the adoption process, had adopted, were praying about adoption, or were otherwise connected to the process to raise their hand.

Out of the entire congregation, only fifteen people raised their hand. 

You guys, the church I go to is not small. That morning, there were probably 400 people in attendance, and out of those 400, fifteen raised their hand. Was I one of the fifteen? No, I wasn't. Was I shocked that only fifteen hands were raised in a church that supports orphanages overseas, and stems from the evangelical and pro-life movement? Yes. 

My eyes instantly welled up with tears and my heart started aching as I looked around. Now, granted, had the pastor phrased his question in a way that included those who prayed for adoption and supported those in the process, there may have been several more hands raised. But, my point remains this- in a church that should be and seems very pro-adoption, only a handful of people were actually involved in the process.

James 1:27 clearly states "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world" (NIV). 

Adoption is not how it was supposed to be. Every child was supposed to be in a forever family, just like no one was meant to suffer from cancer or live through the death of a child or spouse. But it's a fallen world, and children are born every day and left orphan. It happens in your city, it happens in our nation, and it happens around the world. If orphans are at the heart of God and what He considers pure religion (see the verse above)... shouldn't orphans be at the center of our heart too? 

Adoption is not all about sunshine and roses... ask anyone who's been adopted or who has adopted. I have seen adoption go so very wrong, but I've also seen it go so very right. And no matter the end result, adoption is hard. In a culture that values ease, comfort, and prosperity, its no wonder that only fifteen people raised their hand. But what if there's more to the ease and comfort promised by having a perfect American family made up of two biological kids, jobs in corporate America, and a white picket fence?

Adoption can be a picture of redemption, mercy, grace, and love. While adoption is hard, I believe it gives us a glimpse into the heart of God- the love, the mercy, the grace, and the redemption that He has for each one of us.

Now, I do know that not everyone is called to adopt. Do I think there are more people called to adopt than are willing to admit? Absolutely.

Do I think everyone has a role in supporting adoption in one way or the other? Absolutely.

 Do I think we, as the church, have a long way to go when it comes to adoption? Absolutely.

I'm not writing this post to stir up a debate or cause controversy. I am writing this post as a plea with you. Please pray about your role in adoption.

Maybe you are called to adopt but are too scared. I pray that you find the courage and support you need to obey the calling and take the next step.

Maybe you are called to support those adopting and you don't know where to start. The book Orphan Justice is one of my personal favorites- it has a ton of resources and ideas of how to get involved in supporting the adoption process.

Check and see if your church has any adoption support programs. If not, maybe you can be the one to start one. Adoption is expensive, maybe consider donating to someone you know that is raising money to bring their son or daughter home.

Know of a family who just brought a child home? Bring them a meal, offer to run an errand or two for them... many of the same things you would do for a family who just brought a newborn home from the hospital can be applied to a family who just brought home their adopted child.

And last, but certainly not least, something we can all do is pray. Pray about your role in adoption, pray for those who are in the middle of the grueling process, pray for the children that lay awake at night hoping for a forever family. While you're at it, you can pray for some of these kids by face and by name.

That Sunday morning my heart broke because out of 400 people, I was sure more than fifteen would raise their hand. I hope and pray every day that people are receptive to the call of God on their life and that we as a church make it our mission to place every orphan in a forever family.

Check out some of my favorite resources and organizations supporting the cause of the orphan:
International Voice of the Orphan
The Gem Foundation
Adoption: Q&A 
We'd Adopt if We Had Money
Should Single Women Adopt?

What other resources can you add?

What are your thoughts regarding adoption?

Pediatric Nurse: How I Do What I Do

When I tell people I'm a pediatric nurse, the most common response almost always goes something like this: "Oh bless your heart, I could never do that! How do you do that? Seeing all those sick kids all day?" 

Depending on who I'm talking to, I'll either say something along the lines of "It's easier than you think; I love my job" or I'll go into detail about how I do what I do. 

You see, two years ago, I would have had the same reaction. I loved kids and I loved nursing, but I never thought I would be a pediatric nurse. I thought it would be too sad, too hard, and overall just something I wouldn't get into. 

Then in October 2012 I was in a patient's room at Children's Hospital Colorado (where I now work) during my pediatric clinical rotation when the Lord clearly spoke to my heart and said: 

"Sarah, tragic things will happen to these children regardless of whether or not you're a pediatric nurse. They will get sick, they will get in tragic accidents, and yes, some of them will die. If you are a pediatric nurse, however, you will be able to help these kids and their families in a time that they need it the most." 

From that moment on, my entire view towards pediatric nursing shifted. This moment dramatically impacted the way I view pediatric nursing, and is the #1 reason of why I am able to do what I do. 

I LOVE working with kids. 

This may be a given, but really, I love being with kids every single day. It's hard when they cry, and hard when they're mad at you, but kids are also the most forgiving human beings on this planet. The beauty of a child is that you'll walk in the door and receive a terrible stink eye, and then ten minutes later they'll invite you to color with them. And you tell me... in what other job would you be able to feel a child's belly and ask if there's monkeys living inside? 

I get to work with two generations at once 

There is the patient who is a child- my cares, the medicine, the assessments are all centered around them. But then there are often parents and legal guardians who are involved in the care. Many people think that this can be an annoyance- while dealing with tough family situations is often the hardest part of my job, dealing with great parents is often one of the best parts of my job.

I love being able to care for a child (one generation), and teach and equip the parents to then care for their child when they go home (a second generation). Parents are often eager to learn, and empowering them with the knowledge and skills they need to take care of their child at home is one of the aspects of my job that gives me the most satisfaction. 

And lets be honest, as someone who doesn't have my own kids (yet), I've learned a lot from watching the parents I come into contact with- both what I want to do as a parent and what I don't want to do. 

I work in hospital that's fun

The walls at my hospital are pink, yellow, green- you name it. There's paintings, paper cut-outs, and seasonal decorations on almost every wall.The floors have cool designs and everywhere you look there's something with a bright color. Crayons sit at the nurses station, and Frozen characters are found on every little girl's room number. My hospital is the farthest thing from sterile and cold, and for that, I am thankful

Employees are happy

Between the bright walls and (sometimes) smiling kids, I have found most of the people who work at my hospital quite cheerful. Sometimes it's hard, but I think working around kids means you either need (or get) an extra dose of smiles and happiness. That's good for my soul, and good for the patients' healing. 

Those are my 5 reasons of why I'm able to do what I do. Now that I've told you my reasons, do you think you could do it? Has your view of pediatric nursing changed at all?